Third Shift, Sickies and Football

I've been working 3rd shift since November 12th. Although I prefer working nights I've had a hard time adjusting to the change. I haven't been sleeping well and I've been feeling sick almost the entire time. I also miss the daylight.

The Hellhole continues to give me fewer hours. Only have 22 hours this week. Alice offered to give me her shift for tonight but Heidi wouldn't do it. I have no idea why. Everyone below me in seniority has more hours than I do. I guess sales are even worse this year than last. I fear what's going to happen in January with my hours.

Dan and his new girlfriend Heather came Monday night for his birthday dinner. After dinner I got pretty sick and left them at the door in a hurry. I was SO embarrassed. They met in October and have gotten very serious, very fast. She has two boys. She actually talked Dan into going to a photo shoot.

Christmas is just a week away. I look forward to it being over. Will have to work Christmas night to do clearance so I'll be sleeping the day away. Dan will be spending Christmas Eve with Heather's family. I've been invited but I don't plan to go. Don't want a repeat performance of the other night. Every time I eat anything of substance, I get sick. Am sick and tired of being sick and tired.

I've still got 6 days of vacation and 3 personal days left. I think I'll take a vacation in early January but I'm going to save at least one day for Superbowl Sunday (just in case the Lions make it.) They are 10 and 4 and still play Chicago and the Pack (at Lambeau). I know I shouldn't get my hopes up but it's hard. It's been a lot of fun watching them play this year.

I just love their new coach, Jim Caldwell and even though I hated Golden Tate when he played for Notre Dame, I LOVE him as a Lion!

DEFEND THE DEN!!!

184 days and counting!

Merry Christmas!

Even though I didn't have to deal with all the crazies this year since I'm working 3rd shift, I'm still glad it's almost over. I have to go in tonight at midnight. We have to mark all the clearance items down so when the crazy after-Christmas shoppers come in when the store re-opens in the morning, all the prices will be adjusted correctly. There's no way we'll get it all done, though. There's too much stuff and it's just not humanly possible.

From what I understand sales have been down quite a bit this season, which usually means a deeper cut in hours come January. I've already been told I'll be cut down to 24 hours per week (thanks to Obamacare) but the low sales will more than likely make that number even lower. Can't wait to retire in 2015.

It's been so long since I've posted anything here that I'd forgotten how. Anyway, it's that time of year again but this year is much different. I'm working 3rd shift and am very happy about it. Almost no customers, I NEVER have to run a lane, change a watch battery, answer a phone and best of all...NO MANAGERS!!!!!!!!

I've been sick with a cold but otherwise this season has been much less stressful than Christmas's past. I was remembering the worst Christmas I had spent working at the hellhole. It was 2006. I had written an essay of one particular night that I will never forget. I thought I'd dig it up and post it here...then count my blessings that I don't have to deal with the insanity this year.

Here it is:

It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year

(Names changed to protect the not-so-innocent)

This will be my eighth Christmas spent in retail...8th! And except for Christmas Eves past and the one night after Thanksgiving when I was working 3rd shift (Black Friday, 2:00-7:00AM, 2004), I have never seen such a crowd at my store as I saw yesterday (Sat 12/02).

I arrived at the store at approximately 2:23PM. The parking lot was so full that I had to drive around several times just to find a place to park. This was in the employees parking section.

When I walked into the store I encountered a huge line of people waiting for help at the service desk. The line was so long it actually turned a corner and ran all the way to the registers and beyond. Instead of lining up the other direction towards Health & Beauty, there they were, right in front of the entrance doors blocking the way of anyone foolish enough to enter. These people were more-than-likely returning the crappy items they'd bought at greatly reduced prices on Black Friday. That's what you get for buying junk.

And I think to myself...this is gonna be a great day!

The first thing I do every day is stop and pick up the returns for our area. They are placed in laundry baskets on the front wall behind the service desk...just the other side of where all these people are standing in line waiting for help. We have two baskets. One for Women's/Kids and another for Shoes/Men's. They were both overflowing and there were even more things stacked on the floor. Boots, coats, underwear, diapers...you name it, it was there.

I grabbed a shopping cart to load all my goodies into and because there was so much, I had to make several trips back and forth through this long line of people. I'd say, "Excuse me," and they would seperate to let me through, then close up again after I'd passed.

When I came back with my arms full of goodies you'd think they would realize I wasn't just standing there with these treasures just for the fun of it and would kindly step aside so I could get by...but no. They'd stand there and look at me like I was from outer space. So, once again I'd say, "Excuse me." This took about 6 passes before I had gotten all our returns.

Customers...ya can't live with 'em. Ya can't shoot 'em.

Upon arriving in my dept I came upon two more overflowing shopping carts of returns. My wonderful co-worker Candy says, "Oh, I see you picked up more returns. They (service desk) called about them two hours ago but I just haven't gotten up there to get them. I'm going to lunch." And with that, she hands me two of our three phones and goes on her merry way. She wasn't there alone, Judy had just left when I arrived at 2:30. So I don't know what Candy's excuse was for not picking up the returns.

Co-workers... ya can't live with 'em. Ya can't shoot 'em.

The third phone, the jewelry phone, was being manned by Darlene (a very sweet, hard-worker) who was stuck at the jewelry counter because she was swamped with customers. Super Saturday...60% off jewelry. Oh joy!!!

The next two hours I spent my time answering both phones non-stop. One of the calls was from my Assistant Manager. He had a project for me in shoes. What's this? A project??? I have 3 shopping carts full of returns. Fitting rooms full of clothes people have left behind because they don't fit. Clothes, boots, shoes and the paper that comes with the shoes all over the floor. I'm swamped with calls from cashiers for price checks, calls from people who want me to look for a specific pair/size/color of shoes or a snowsuit for their cousin's 18 month old. Calls from women wanting to get into the fitting rooms (we keep them locked). Calls from outside the store from people who want to speak to someone in Stationery, or Media. (Why call the women's clothing dept if you want Stationery or Media? HUH?)

I'm alone on one of the busiest days I've seen in months and this guy has a PROJECT??? Riiiiiight!

So, I kindly tell him I'm not in the position to take on a project as I will be constantly called away from said project by these nasty interruptions also known as customers and these non-stop phone calls.

His reply, "Oh, yeah, I see your point. I guess this isn't the best time for a project is it?"

Ah, NO!

So, 4:30 finally arrives and along with it, another co-worker. "Oh thank goodness," I rejoice. "Help has arrived!"

Not so fast!!!

The assistant manager promptly approaches her and gives her this all important shoe project. It's time for Darlene to leave which means we now have to cover jewelry. The whole dept is trashed from top to bottom, there's customers everywhere, the phones are still ringing non-stop and he insists she tackle this shoe project?

Assistant Managers...ya can't live with 'em. Ya can't shoot 'em.

Sometime around 5:30 or so things get a bit quieter. People must be home eating dinner. Another co-worker has arrived and one more will be here at 6:00. Time for a break.

Yay!

After my break, the store once again gets busy and the next 5 hours are spent picking up after the biggest slobs this earth has ever seen. Re-hang, re-fold, re-place...re-peat! It's endless and infuriating at the same time.

At one point I'm folding Plus Size tops, completely zoned out (ya have to zone out to remain sane) when all of a sudden I notice a man's face (and not a nice face) about 5 inches from mine.

I'm like...what the.....!!!

He says, "I was just wondering if you're having fun?"

Me: "Do I look like I'm having fun?"

Him: "You look like your cleaning up after a bunch of slobs."

Me: "That's what I do...Anything I can help you with?"

Him: (with a nasty, evil grin) "I don't think you'd be willing to help me with what I want."

Me: (I think I've just been propositioned at age 51) "You're probably right. What ELSE can I help you with?"

Him: (Laughing as if something was funny)..."Where are the wallets?"

Icky old men...ya can't live with 'em. Ya can't shoot 'em.

As this wonderful day begins to draw to a close, one of my co-workers heads home for the night, another goes on lunch leaving me the jewelry phone and the other co-worker also decides she needs her break. So, here I am all alone once again, this time with all three phones. Still ringing, but not quite non-stop...that is until I get a call to the jewelry counter.

A very nice lady wants to buy a necklace and a watch. No problem, so I begin to ring up her purchases when...r-r-r-r-ring. The fashions phone on my back-right pocket starts ringing. R-r-r-r-ring. The shoes phone on my back-left pocket starts ringing. At this very same instant my co-worker comes up to the register with snacks for her break..."Are you almost done? I don't want to wait in one of the long lines to check-out."

Calgon...take me away!

I get the lady's jewelry rung up and take care of the two phone calls. Somewhere along the way my co-worker decided to wait in one of those lines afterall. It's now time to take my foreign objects (things found in our dept that don't belong in our dept) up to the returns area behind the service desk. I put these items in their respective baskets and turn around to see the Assistant Store Director giving me the dirtiest of looks.

Her: "Who's covering Fashions? Who's got the phone?" she bellows.

Me: (completely flabbergasted) "I am...I do."

Her: "Why didn't you answer? I've been calling and calling."

Me: "I always answer the phone when it rings. I may have been on it or perhaps the battery is dead."

Her: "I even paged Fashions. Didn't you hear me...I screamed it!!!"

Me: "I'm sorry, I've been overwhelmed and I didn't hear the page, either."

Her: "Where's Nadine? Where's Natalie? Where's Susan??? Why didn't one of them answer the page?"

Me: "Susan has gone home. Nadine is on break and Natalie is at lunch."

Her: (A bit sympathetic by this time...but not much) "Oh...well, the display of pajamas and slippers in the drive aisle hasn't been touched. Someone has to get over there and pick it up."

Me: "I didn't even know we had a display over there. I'll do that right now."

Assistant Store Directors...ya can't live with 'em. Ya can't shoot 'em.

Finally, it's 10:55 and my time to leave is nearly here but before we can leave we have to call the closing Manager to get permission. So, I dial the number and the phone rings and rings and rings. No answer. Next step, page him. I continue to tidy up what I can and by the time he finallly gets back to me it's after 11:00.

Now, if I punch out late and get overtime I get written up with a 'black mark' that goes on my permanant record. Three write-ups and you're gone! But overtime doesn't kick in until you're 7 minutes or more past your scheduled clock-out time. I made it by the skin of my teeth...which also means I was working without pay. (Wal*Mart isn't the only one!!!)

Management cuts our hours yet can't understand why the work isn't getting done. We are out-numbered 100:1 and none of us are capable of miracles. (Except maybe Darlene 'cause she's so sweet!)

The customers are complete slobs, rude and demanding. They treat us like we're no better than the dirt under their feet. They expect us to magically make things appear out of thin air. They lie, cheat and rob us blind. They poop in underwear and leave it wadded up in the fitting rooms. They leave bloodied panties hidden inside 'our' clothes in the fitting rooms. They steal everything from jewelry to $70.00 bottles of Scotch and hide the alarm tags and packages in the fitting rooms. They leave shopping carts full of groceries behind because the check-out lines are too long and they don't want to wait. Guess who has to put all those groceries back?

When nothing I say will satisfy an angry customer I send them to a manager and have been known to tell them that if they throw a big enough fit they'll get whatever they want, plus a gift card to boot! The customer is always right afterall.

So, at this most wonderful time of the year I ask, have you hugged a retail worker today?

Believe me, they need it.

I Survived Black Friday!

I guess there are T-shirts you can buy with "I Survived Black Friday" on them. I gotta get me one of those.

When I was a kid I loved Christmas. I used to make up a 'count-down' calendar with the number of days til Christmas on it and cross each day off before I went to bed. It wasn't because of the gifts...we weren't exactly well-off so that wasn't that big of a deal. I remember we'd try to stay up all night Christmas Eve playing Old Maid in the attic. But I don't remember if I ever made it through the entire night. I've always loved the beautiful lights and decorations, the music of the season, always hoped for snow (Christmas day especially) and the highlight of the season was watching 'Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer' on CBS. (I still do that.) But, I think the thing I looked forward to the most was...NO SCHOOL!!!

When I became a mother the best part of Christmas was watching my son open his gifts. One year I started shopping in September as soon as school started. That way I could get the gifts wrapped and hidden while Danny was at school. But I was too excited and I ended up giving him several of his gifts early. Then I had to get more so he'd have some to open on Christmas morning. :o)

My love of the holidays changed when I started working retail in '97. For the first time in my life I had to work Thanksgiving day. Didn't understand that...who the heck shops on Thanksgiving? Well, it turns out, a LOT of people. For the first time in my life I saw the 'real' nature of humans...and it wasn't good. I found myself literally surrounded by people who just HAD to HAVE 10 strings of icicle lights for $1.50/box. Or the collapsible 5' lighted-rope tree for $9.00. Once the mad rush was over I actually sat down on one of our step ladders and cried like a baby.

The following year I didn't even put up a tree and for each year after, until I quit the hellhole in '02, my home was Christmas tree free. Since returning in '04 I've put up a small tree that I keep decorated all year, wrapped in a huge plastic bag. But this year there's no room for it since Dan has returned home and all his stuff is taking up space.

I really hate this time of year and I dread it the rest of the year. I actually had several nightmares this past weekend that woke me right up. I loathe those 4 - 5 weeks between Thanksgiving and Christmas because they ARE a nightmare. A real nightmare. It's even worse now that I'm old and have to be at work by 3AM so people who have nothing better to do can get some socks at half-off.

Madness!

This past Thursday, Thanksgiving Day, I arrived at the hellhole at 3AM. Our doorbuster sales didn't start until 6AM but the store was still crowded because people come in during the wee hours of the night, grab what they want, then just wait until 6:00 to checkout. We were 'out of stock' before the sale signs were even put up! I saw a long-time acquittance shopping and it was all I could do to not tell her "Shame on you!"

All day long I had to tell people we were out of the $20.00 Caterpillar jackets. This made some people very angry. I guess they haven't yet grasped the concept that in order to get the deals you have to get there long before the sale starts.

I did get to enjoy a wonderful dinner at Babcocks. Unfortunately, my nerves got the best of me and I got sick. :o(

Black Friday morning I got there again at 3AM only to find people 'camped out' in the shoe dept on lawn chairs and lying on the (filthy) carpeted floor. They and their shopping carts were all over the place and I had work to do. Managements' brilliant idea of having us come in at that ungodly hour so we could get the stock out before the crowd shows up had backfired. Just like I said it would. Kids were running around like wild animals and I gave them my best "stop or I'll beat you bloody" look.

*sigh*

After 4 straight days of doorbuster deals I am exhausted and already sick of Christmas. Only 4 more weeks to go.

Ho - ho - ho!

Just One More Day!

The last minute shoppers were out in full force today. It was very busy which helps the time go by faster. Just one more day of this madness. I can't wait til it's over.

Stupid Questions

I've been asked some really ridiculous questions during my stint at the hellhole but this one has quickly gone to the top of my list of stupid questions.

Pretty much everyone knows that it's two weeks before Christmas, everyone except a woman I checked out at the register today. The store was packed with shoppers. Lines were backed up into Fashions. The softlines lead wanted me to take some people with small orders at the jewelry counter and ring them up.

This woman only had 5 or 6 items and as I began scanning them she came up with this brilliant question..."Why is it so busy in here?"

What do you say to someone so clueless?

In case I haven't mentioned it before...I hate this time of year.

13 days and counting!!!

Thanksgiving

Had to be to work this morning at 6AM. That's better than last year. I think I went in at 4:30AM. Anyway, the place was crazy busy and I was told that people were sleeping on the floor in the shoe dept all night. There is NOTHING in this entire world that I want bad enough to cause me to sleep on a dirty, filthy, puked on, pooped on carpet in a retail store the night before Thanksgiving. These people are sick! I seriously think there's something wrong with them.

Go home and eat turkey, you turkeys! Maybe if you'd stay home on Thanksgiving, so could I.

I'm really looking forward to tomorrow. If I'm lucky, I'll be able to ruin someone's Christmas by telling them we've sold out of the item they waited in line for 6 hours to get. It's always the highlight of the season when people go all ape-shit over stuff like that. (Can't tolerate Black Friday shoppers, either.)

At least my whole day didn't suck. After work I picked up fixins for burritos and went to Dan's apartment. Got there in time to see the Lions lose...again. Dan made the burritos (he's a good cook). I stuffed myself then fell asleep on his couch. What can I say. I only slept about an hour and ½ last night.

One down, 29 more hellish shopping days til the nightmare ends. I don't know if I'll make it til the end. :o(

Northern Flicker

Yesterday, just before heading out to work I saw a Northern Flicker at the feeders.

At first I thought it was the Red-bellied Woodpecker but on closer inspection, I could see the difference and knew what it was. Unfortunately, it was dark by the time I got home but this afternoon I got out of work early enough to watch and see if he/she returns. No luck. I won't give up though.

Here we go again. The nightmare known as the 'holiday shopping season' has officially begun. They have Christmas music playing already at the hellhole. If I remember correctly, this is the earliest I've ever heard it played.

Another change this year is the amount of stock we're getting in. It's unbelievable. There are skids and skids of new stuff everywhere in the back room. So much crap that you can't get to your own stock to put it out. Today, a co-worker had to climb over several skids of dog food to get a crib mattress for a customer. The aisle in the backroom is almost always blocked so you can't even get through with your load.

God help me! I hate this time of year.

Holidays need to be outlawed

It seems that every month there's another stupid holiday. When you work retail, holidays suck! This Sunday is Mother's Day which means the next several days will be crazy busy at the jewelry counter.

I hate the jewelry counter. As my son would say, I hate it with a purple passion. And guess who gets to cover jewelry all weekend because our jewelry diva is on vacation...that's right. Me.

I really hate my job. :o(

It's Finally Over!

I don't think I've ever been so tired in my life. After having my hours cut worse than they've ever been during the Christmas rush, the last two weeks I've worked nearly 40 hours each and it's been exhausting. The knee is not happy right now, either. I just have to make it through one more day then I'll have a few days off to recuperate.

I'm so glad it's over.

There's a First Time for Everything

I worked the jewelry counter today (Friday) and it was very busy. Almost steady customers from the time I walked in until I left at 5:30. A couple of women were making some purchases and I had spent several minutes helping them. As I rang them up I heard a man call my name. It's always a bit off-putting when a total stranger calls you by name...as a matter of fact, I hate it. But that's what happens when you wear a name badge.

Anyway, the man asked if he would be next and I looked around to see if there were any other customers gathered around the counter. Seeing that he was the only one there I told him, "I believe so."

"Good," he said, "then I'll wait."

He had already waited quite a long time as the two women ahead of him looked at several different pieces and couldn't seem to make up their minds. That's par for the course at the jewelry counter, though. And 9 times out of 10, the customer ends up buying nothing after you've spent 20-30 minutes helping them.

After I finished up with the two women I asked the man how I could help him. He was looking for a gold, heart shaped pendant with diamonds that would cost around $100.00 and of course, the one he liked the most was close to $800.00. I hated to tell him that we didn't have any diamond pendants around $100.00 in gold but we might be able to come close to that in silver.

As I was showing him several pieces my manager came and started helping some other customers that had gathered around. After about 20 minutes the man finally decided on a pendant, I rang him up, thanked him and moved on to the next customer.

He then called my manager over and was talking to her about me. I couldn't hear what he was saying but I was sure he was complaining because he appeared angry. That seems to be all that customers do these days, complain. So, I'm wracking my brain wondering what on earth I had done to make him angry and knew that I was gonna be in big trouble and probably get written up for it.

Once he left my manager approached me and I'm thinking, here we go! She asked, "Did you hear what he said?"

I answered, "No."

She replied, "He said if he owned a store he would steal me away from her. He was so impressed with all the help you gave him that he just wanted to let me know how much he appreciated it."

I was floored!

She went on to say that she thought for sure he was going to complain because he seemed angry (he did to me, too) but instead, he was very grateful.

I have worked at that store for 9½ years and this is the first time any customer has ever done anything like that. Mostly they treat us like we're dirt under their feet.

That made my day.

Tis the season...

Well, it's here. That time of the year that I dread the most. Tomorrow is supposed to be a day of thanks but I'll be thankful when it's over. Sales start at 5AM and Thanksgiving is one of the busiest shopping days of the season. (People who shop on Thanksgiving ought to be roasted alongside the turkey.)

I'll never understand the mentality of shoppers who are so willing to put up with the craziness year after year. If I didn't have to be there I wouldn't be caught dead in a store this weekend.

Hopefully no one will be trampled to death this year.